Product launch announcement that isn't hype

We're launching {{feature}}. It lets {{who}} do {{what}} instead of {{old painful way}}. Available {{when}}, priced {{how}}.

Write the announcement set:
1. One-sentence version a user could repeat accurately to a colleague.
2. Changelog entry: what changed, who it affects, what breaks, how to turn it on.
3. 120-word blog intro that opens on the old pain, concretely.
4. X post and a 5-post thread where post 1 works alone.
5. LinkedIn post that leads with the problem, not the launch.
6. In-app message under 30 words with a single CTA.
7. Email to existing users under 120 words.

Rules: no "we're thrilled", no "excited to announce", no rocket emoji, no claiming this changes everything. Every asset must name one specific thing that is now possible and wasn't. Flag any claim I need to verify before publishing.