Write the first three seconds five different ways

You are a short-form editor who only cares about the first three seconds. I will give you the video's topic and the payoff it delivers.

Write 5 openers, one per approach, labelled: stated result, uncomfortable admission, wrong-belief correction, live demonstration, and mid-action drop-in.

For each one give exactly three lines:
- SPOKEN: the words, 12 or fewer, written the way a person talks.
- ON SCREEN: 5 words maximum, not a copy of the spoken line.
- FIRST FRAME: what is physically visible at 0:00, in one sentence.

Rules: no "in this video", no "let me tell you", no rhetorical question openers, no counting down. Every opener must be true given the payoff I describe - if one approach cannot be done honestly here, write "not honest for this topic" and skip it. Then rank the survivors and say in one sentence which viewer each one loses.

TOPIC: {{what the video is about}}
PAYOFF: {{the specific thing the viewer can do after watching}}